Love: kinds. Parental love and its types

What is love? A chemical reaction in the human body that occurs under certain conditions, or emotional psychological dependence? No scientist has so far been able to accurately answer this question. For each person there is an own concept of the word "love". Types of relations of such a plan are found in everyday life: parental care, patriotism, passion, love, friendship, attraction to the opposite sex.

Types of female love, like the male, are absolutely similar. However, there is no single general concept of love relationships.

The main types of love between people

In philosophy, the following 7 types of love relationships are distinguished:

• Eros. Passion, obscuring common sense, the desire at all costs to have a physical possession of a person. Usually it grows into another type, but more often it passes quickly and suddenly, as it does. The peculiarity of erotic love is a continuous stream of emotions, a storm of exhausting and destructive feelings that do not lend themselves to logical explanation.
• Storge. Tenderness, combined with perfect mutual understanding. Partners here are for each other and beloved, and close friends.
• Agape. Sacrifice mixed with passion. It is formed due to a combination of eros and storge. It is rare enough. In the relationship, both partners develop, learn to give, not demanding anything in return, while forgetting about their ego.
• Ludus. Love, in which there are no deep feelings, provokes a search for stronger emotions when communicating with a large number of partners. Psychologists consider the people to be a monogamous, consumer kind of love relationship.
• Pragma. Rational relations, formed from storga and lyudus. A person comes to this kind of love, relying not on emotion, but on logic and reason. However, pragmatic relations often lead to a prolonged alliance.
• Mania. An obsession with a partner, either collapsing on their own, or growing into a more stable kind of relationship. Mania is a combination of Ludus and Eros. Features: attacks of jealousy, complete dependence on a person, loss of emotional balance, tension.
• Philia. The most disinterested and pure relationship. Love of this kind of people feel for their children, a close environment (relatives, friends). Philia is distinguished by the fact that spirituality prevails over physical closeness.

Psychology

Modern science of relationships, emotions and self-knowledge, mental activity of people, singles out love, the types of which are presented below.

Curves and the right relationship. In the curve of love, a person either continues to experience strong feelings for lost relationships, or makes selfish demands for a real partner. This relationship is accompanied by jealousy, sentimentality, anxiety, using the feelings of a partner for their own purposes. The correct relationship is the care of a loved one, the presentation of the individual's exaggerated claims to himself.

"I give" and "I want". In the first case, one of the partners has a desire to give care and positive emotions, in the second - to take away, not giving anything in return. Separately, relations are extremes, exhausting people. However, their combination leads to complete harmony and mutual understanding.

Deal and donation. Love-bargain is the basis of most love relationships. It is an exchange of something under certain conditions, if the agreements of this type are not observed, the relations are broken. Gifting also implies a full, unselfish return to the partner.

Love is sick and love is healthy. Finding a person in a sick, neurotic love, exhausts emotionally and mentally. At the heart of the relationship lies the painful attachment of the lover in love with the object and the desire to suffer. A healthy relationship gives positive emotions to both partners .

Decision or reaction. Love can be a manifestation of a reaction to external influences. Here, a person absolves himself of all responsibility for the appearance of feelings, and for their disappearance. In the love-decision the person is fully aware of each of the actions and manifestations of emotions. The solution is not only feelings, but also the daily actions of a person.

Parental love and its types

According to the research, parents tend to have a disinterested and pure love for the child, in which they exalt him above themselves. But at least there are painful relationships for the baby himself and for the parents.

Maternal and paternal love, the types and manifestations of which are described in family psychology, impose an indelible imprint on the future adult member of society. The way a person will become in the future depends entirely on attention, education and love given to him in childhood.

What are the types of love for the child that parents show? In children's psychology there are only 8 types of relationships between mother, father and baby.

Effective warm interconnection

It is based on sympathy, respect for desires and feelings, spiritual closeness with the child. The motto of parental love: "I want my baby to achieve everything he wants in life, and I will be his support." Relations are formed due to the constant manifestation of care, support, a safe emotional background in the family, and the parents' acceptance that their child is an independent person.

A pity

Relationship without respect, but with a manifestation of sympathy and intimacy. Excessive care, distrust, based on the imaginary (real) physical and mental deficiencies of the child - all this is compassionate love. Types of manifestation: non-acceptance of personality, lack of support and faith in the ability, the ability of the baby. The motto of compassionate relations: "I'm sorry that my child is not sufficiently developed in this or that plan, but I still love him."

Disengagement

Kinds of love for the child, including respect and warm feelings, support, but occurring at a certain distance in communication - this is detached parental love. The relationship is based on encouraging the child's success, experiencing pride in his offspring, but at the same time ignorance of his inner world, views and preferences, and inability to solve the problems of the baby.

Condescending aloofness

The main thing in this style of communication between parents and the child: disrespect, a manifestation of sympathy for a long distance. Parents justify any failures, shortcomings of the child's physical and mental development of heredity, while not trying to prevent his possible failures and negative experience, thus dooming himself to the unhappiness in life.

The pursuit

The mingling of respect, intimacy and antipathy are the main qualities of parental love of this type. The use of strict control by parents, with strictness, excessive moralization, pursues one goal: the complete refraction of the psyche and the individual characteristics of the child. In this case, adults admit the strength of the will of their baby.

Rejection

This behavioral feature is rare in both parents, most often in one of them. Dad or mother are annoyed by the presence of one's baby by their side, do not want to help him in solving any problems, do not feel warm emotions towards him.

Contempt

Parents who use contempt as a prerogative behavior, consider the child a failure, due to its specific characteristics. At the same time, adults do not notice the child's successes, considering them insignificant, and also feel pity for themselves for a relative relationship with the offspring. Basically, in families that use this type of communication, it is customary to remove all responsibility for the child's development, shifting it to specialists (teachers, tutors, psychologists).

Psychological failure

Parents do not participate in the life of the baby, while respecting his strength and ability. Adults watch the child from a distance, without providing him with the feasible help in solving the problem.

It is worth noting that none of the forms of communication is not found separately. Basically, parents use several kinds of love for their baby, but it all depends on the child's age and behavioral, mental characteristics of the family.