Where do children's fears come from?

As a rule, adults treat the child's fear with indulgence, if not indifferently. They, who are accustomed to think rationally, find it difficult to recognize serious fears of the baby because of another "bedside monster." Therefore, parents calm their children with the only reasonable way from their point of view: unconfirmed (in the opinion of the child) assurances that monsters do not exist. Often tired fathers and mothers require children not to invent stupidity and quickly go to bed without even realizing how real the "monster" is for their child.

The danger of ignoring fear

Such an attitude does not dispel children's fears, on the contrary, it aggravates them. Sooner or later it will affect the child. Accustomed to being scolded and not taken seriously, the kid simply stops complaining and closes in himself. But he will not forget about fear, and will begin to experience it alone, not knowing where to get protection. In such cases, the innocent fear of darkness or strangers with age threatens to turn into a real phobia. Having changed so that the person himself does not remember his original nature, fear will continue to pursue his victim all adult life.

Emotional component

Why understand where the fears of children arise? Mainly in order to be able to properly respond to this. To understand the cause is to take the first step towards getting rid of it. Therefore, it is so important to talk with the child, listen to it carefully and try to find out what is hidden behind this or that fear. After all, as we know, we are afraid not of darkness, but of what is in it.

Fear is one of the strongest human emotions, which can not be underestimated. It affects both children and adults. And the power of this feeling does not depend on the origin of the cause (imaginary or real). Even if it seems that the child's fear of fictional monsters is much more harmless than adult fears, this is not so.

The reaction to the danger is the same for all of us. Instant release of a large amount of adrenaline into the blood causes a real hormonal surge in the body. The latter entails not the best feelings emotionally. Every once in a while (although in fact - many times, whatever that may say) experienced this unpleasant sensation, when the body seems to fetter, paralyze, and the heart is ready to jump out of the chest. The body is designed so that people can not long struggle with a sense of fear. Therefore, it must not be suppressed, but dispelled.

Kinds of fears for toddlers. Fear of loneliness

One of the most common is the fear of loneliness. And do not think that it is experienced only by relatively grown-up children. In fact, such a manifestation is none other than the voice of the instinct of self-preservation, which is especially developed in infants. Fear of loneliness can manifest itself in the first months of life. He makes the kids worry about leaving the mother, experiencing anxiety and emotional discomfort without her caring and support.

At such a young age, it is the mother that symbolizes protection from the dangers of the world around, and therefore her absence is a serious traumatic factor for children. Instinctively, they associate themselves with it, as a whole. And only with age, when the kids are already beginning to realize themselves and to know the world, childhood fears of loneliness become dull. Usually this happens to two or three years.

Fear of strangers

Another fear is associated with strangers. From the biological point of view, it is fully justified: the child is afraid of what he does not know. In this case - unfamiliar people who are potentially capable of inflicting harm on him. In life, such fear is manifested in shyness, unwillingness to greet with "strange" aunts, attempts to hide behind mother. It passes if you calmly explain to the child that the stranger will not do anything wrong.

Fear of strangers also occurs at a very early age. Then it manifests itself most sharply. The kid can not stand up for himself, so nature endowed him with the desire to avoid danger. By the age of six such childish fears are gradually weakening. Kids begin to react more calmly to the presence of strangers.

Fear of fictional beings

By the age of three, children actively study the environment, get acquainted with the peculiarities of the vast world. In this case, you can not do without animated films, books and various pictures. During this period, there often arise childish fears associated with mythical creatures, often taken from some artistic work. Sometimes - imposed by the parents themselves through negligence. The latter happens, for example, if it is enough often and convincingly to declare to a spoiled child that he will be taken away by an evil witch.

Until the age of three, fears are based more on instincts, and fear of fictional beings is no exception. Do not forget that the fantastic world of the kid seems quite real. Every time, frightening him with a fictional character, parents force the child to seriously worry for their life and health.

Correct reaction

Whatever it was, in no case should not neglect the emotional state of the child. If he is afraid of something, you should carefully ask him about it. Better yet, offer to draw and then demonstratively crumple, break or throw out the "fear" visualized in this way. It is equally important that the baby feels protected, knew that he has someone to turn to for help and tell everything.

You can not mock at childish fear, ignore it or recognize it as irrelevant. Instead, you should calmly explain to the child why he should not be afraid of it, find an opportunity to defeat fear. Then the kid will not feel helpless. Also, the predisposition to fears is strongly influenced by relationships in the family, especially between parents. This is one of the reasons why quarrels and clarification of relations should take place outside the child's attention zone.