Today, unfortunately, nobody is surprised by the situation when a husband cheats on his wife. Someone surprisingly tolerates such behavior, believing that representatives of the strong half of humanity by nature are polygamous creatures. Someone does not intend to put up with this state of affairs for a second. Today we will try to understand why husbands change wives. Also we suggest you to learn how to check if your beloved is faithful, and what to do if he is carried away by another woman.
Scientists have conducted large-scale studies to find out how many percent of men change wives. The results were not very comforting. So, it turned out that about 74% of Russian men who are in an official or civil marriage, at least once entered into an intimate relationship on the side, and 40% do it regularly. Specialists also came to the conclusion that, on average, such novels last about three months. For this time the violator of matrimonial fidelity about 7-10 times comes into intimate relations with his new partner. However, every fourth husband changes his wife much longer. Their novels can last from one to several years. More often than not, during long years of marriage, men experience several similar relationships.
In addition, experts came to the conclusion that treason, betrayal, are increasingly becoming the reasons for the separation of spouses. If another 40 years ago this situation was perceived by women as a terrible tragedy and in most cases ended in divorce, today many spouses try to solve such problems together and try to save the family.
Why do men cheat on their wives?
Psychologists are sure that no single couple is insured against such a situation, regardless of the number of children and years lived together. Therefore, in order to prevent such a development of events, every representative of the beautiful half of humanity should know the main reasons why a husband cheats on his wife.
This reason, perhaps, is the most common. The fact is that very often the representatives of the stronger sex begin to go "to the left" because of the instincts inherent in them by nature: they try to compare women in order to find the best. Treason of this kind has nothing to do with love. Therefore, the legitimate spouses of men who are fond of passing novels tend not to worry about their marriage.
The emergence of dangerous circumstances
Often a husband cheats on his wife, going on a business trip, on vacation, on a long trip or on a stag party. A sudden feeling of freedom, leaping hormones, and often alcohol, can put a fat cross on matrimonial fidelity.
This reason is equally relevant not only for men, but also for female adultery. So, often after 10-15 years of marriage, spouses stop noticing the attractiveness and dignity of each other. And if to all this is added a uniform and routine family life, seasoned with regular quarrels, it becomes almost impossible to avoid treason.
This reason is very rare, but such situations still happen. It happens that after living with a woman for many years, a man realizes that he is really attracted to representatives of the opposite sex. In this case, the deceived spouse does not even have to try and save the marriage.
Test for the betrayal of her husband
Very often, many women are completely unaware of their spouses in infidelity. The fact of treason is opened either accidentally, or if a man decides to divorce and officially leave his lawful wife. In this regard, each representative of the beautiful half of humanity should be aware of several alarming "bells" that may be harbingers of adultery.
Signs of betrayal of her husband
First of all, it is worth to be vigilant if your spouse starts to closely monitor your appearance: stylishly dress, use expensive cologne, often shave and visit a hairdresser, etc. This is all, of course, little things, but you should not ignore them. Also, should be alerted if your loved one has become too attentive to you. It is possible that there is no trick here, but there is a possibility that he feels guilty for what he did and therefore tries to surround the legitimate spouse with care and affection.
A sign of her husband's infidelity may be the sharp appearance in his life of new friends with whom he spends a lot of time, but you somehow do not introduce. Also, suspicion should cause excessive workload at work, forcing your spouse to spend the night in the office. Of course, everything can be completely innocent, and your husband just makes a career, but there is a risk that this is not so.
Another suspicious moment is the change of habits. For example, your husband suddenly quit smoking, began to eat other foods or prefer, for example, previously unloved to them a brand of wine. It is likely that such changes are pushed by his mistress.
Practically there is no need to carry out a test for the betrayal of the husband, if money from your family budget suddenly began to disappear without a trace, or the spouse began to spend more time on their earnings. After all, a mistress needs to give flowers, gifts, drive her to restaurants, etc.
If you have confidently said to yourself: "I suspect a husband of treason", then in order not to exhaust himself with vain emotions, it is necessary to try to find out the truth. To do this, first of all pay attention to how your spouse communicates by phone. After all, if he constantly goes out to talk in another room, then most likely he has something to hide. For more confidence, you can check the contents of his phone. Perhaps, it does not delete information about calls and stores pleasant SMS messages. In addition, pay attention to your husband's car. Inspect attentively the salon: if the spouse uses the machine for meetings with the mistress, then you will most likely find fallen hair, a sequin, a scarf or other evidence.
One of the obvious proofs of the infidelity of a man are strangers' hair on his clothes, the aroma of unfamiliar female spirits, a barely visible trace on his cheek from lipstick, etc. Also, do not forget that all the fairer sex lovers like to give their loved ones gifts. Some men will never bring him home, some will give a new tie or sweater for present from friends or co-workers. Therefore, the appearance of such a thing on your spouse should alert you.
Do not forget that today many novels begin on the Internet. Therefore, if your husband began to spend a long time with correspondence, then be sure to find out who is his interlocutor.
If you seriously suspect your spouse of infidelity, but can not prove anything, carefully take a closer look at your own friends, neighbors, as well as his female colleagues. After all, most men enter into relations with representatives of the beautiful half of humanity, who are well known.
So, as we can see, there are a lot of variants of how to check husband for treason. But what if the result turned out to be positive, and you found out that your spouse is wrong to you?
How to survive the betrayal of her husband
Of course, the first reaction of any woman facing such a betrayal on the part of the spouse is a huge resentment, a shock and a desire to forever break off relations with the deceiver. Often, representatives of the weaker sex fall into a real depression, as a result of which they need the help of a psychologist. With the betrayal of her husband you need to calm down and try to take a sober look at the situation. Of course, this is not always easy. However, the main thing with this state of things, as they say, is not to break firewood.
Forgive the betrayal of her husband?
A single-valued answer to this question can not be given. After all, a woman should decide for herself whether to continue the relationship after the betrayal of her husband. If your spouse does not yet know that you are aware of his "dirty" deeds, then try to think about the situation as calmly as possible. Analyze his behavior in this situation, after all, it is possible that he hid his infidelity with all his might not to injure you, which, of course, is a weak consolation, but proves his concern and desire to remain close to you. Also remember the years spent together: what was good and bad? Think about what reasons might prompt your husband to go "to the left." Perhaps you yourself unintentionally pushed him to such a step.
Talk to your spouse
Try as calmly as possible, without shouts and hysteria, to discuss with your husband the situation that has developed. If the spouse proposes to divorce, since she has long been in a relationship with another woman whom she loves, then it makes no sense to try to keep him near herself by force. But what if he repents of what he has done and assures him that he will never repeat such a mistake in the future? Of course, every woman will respond in her own way to the question "Should I forgive her husband's betrayal?" But still you should carefully think everything over before you break the long-term relationship or, on the contrary, again believe a person who regularly deceives you.
How to build your relationship with your spouse after his betrayal?
If you could forgive your husband's infidelity, then in the future you should try to do everything possible to prevent this situation from happening again. First of all, never reproach your spouse for what happened. Also do not waste time and nerves on thinking about the former rival. After all, even if it is younger, more attractive and more slender than you, it is not at all important, because as a result you were the winner.
To revive past relationships, experts recommend finding common ground with your spouse: for example, engage in a common hobby. Also a great idea will be a joint holiday.
Take care of your home. Buy beautiful dishes, regularly put things in order and prepare delicious meals and dinners for your husband. In this case, he will always be sure that his house is loved and waiting, and he will not want to side with him.
Take care of yourself. Pay attention not only to your husband and children, but also to yourself. Visit beauty salons, go on fitness, buy beautiful clothes and ornaments. Your spouse will appreciate that his beloved wife looks great.
How to take revenge on the unfaithful spouse?
Unfortunately, many women who are confronted with the infidelity of her husband, try to answer the same. In an outburst of emotions, such an act seems to be a good way of revenge, but later it has to be greatly regretted. Therefore, do not be like an unfaithful spouse, because you can teach him another way. On how to punish her husband for treason, and talk later.
One of the most common and rather effective options is the boyfriend's admission to the unfaithful spouse. Do not wash his clothes, do not prepare food for him, and in general, in every possible way, ignore him. Of course, there is a risk that a man will get angry and leave you, but maybe it will be better, because you are not a servant, but a legitimate spouse.
The next option is very effective, but rather difficult. Try to dumbfound your spouse: behave calmly and even cheerfully, you can play a trick on his betrayal. After all, he was expecting a completely different reaction from your side. Any man in this situation will be confused, start to harass you about the reasons for your behavior, and also will make every effort to return your love and restore peace and harmony in the house.
Also, as a very pleasant option for revenge, you can just take care of yourself. If you really want to "let off steam," then yell, beat the dishes. However, it is best to start meeting with friends and friends more often, visit a beauty salon, go in for sports, go, after all, on leave without a spouse. Your spouse will see that he has underestimated you, and that you can perfectly do without him, and will do everything possible to regain your disposition and attention again.