What should I do if a middle-aged crisis hits you?

Many men go through a period that completely changes their outlook on life. They think they could be happier. And if they are going to radically change their lives, they feel the need to do it immediately.

Such thoughts can cause a mid-life crisis. If you can realize yourself in this phase, and then make a reasonable choice, then quickly get out of the crisis and start a happy life.

How to recognize the midlife crisis

"A real crisis, as a rule, causes a desire to immediately change your life," says Calvinus Colaruzo, MD, and professor of clinical psychiatry at the University of California. He gives an example from his practice when a man wrote a note to his wife, withdrew all the money from his account and settled in another city without warning.

This type of midlife crisis is rare. In most cases, men begin with minor changes, and the crisis takes a long time. You, for example, can tell your wife that you want to quit your job, and you do it. Or you say that you do not like your marriage, and you may even decide to divorce. But you can not change everything and do not do desperate things. And many men after such a painful reassessment decide to stay with what they have.

The main signs of the crisis

There are signs that you can understand that you are going to go through the middle age crisis phase, and they include the following:

• You just turned 40 years old. Most often, men face a crisis of middle age of 40 or 50 years.
• You are worried about the key elements of your life. You may not be satisfied with your career growth, family, health and feel the desire to do something to fix everything.

• You feel that you do not have much time left for change. Many men begin to feel the urgent need to make changes in their lives. Often this happens when a man notices that his appearance is changing, and the endurance is not what it used to be. It can also happen when a man becomes a grandfather, or when his friend or parent dies. Nevertheless, it can not be said that a middle-aged crisis is inevitable when such things happen.

• You make unusual decisions for yourself. Men can go through a "rebellious teenage age" during this period of their lives. A sure sign of the crisis is that you feel trapped, and you have a great temptation to behave in such a way as to blow up your life. In such cases, men begin to abuse alcohol, find mistresses, leave their families, feel that their lives are no longer suitable for them. They are more concerned about their appearance, they have a craving for excitement and thrill.

How you can survive the crisis

The crisis of the middle of life can lead to both growth and self-destruction. You can search for the reasons why you feel unhappy, and then come up with a solution to eliminate them. This is growth.

On the other hand, if you make impulsive decisions, for example, change your life for the sake of a relationship with a young partner who ends quickly, or buy a car that you can not afford, it leads to destruction.

How to protect yourself from errors

• Your feelings are not a team to action. The fact that you feel like you have to quit your job, family or home does not mean that you really should do it. These feelings may indeed indicate problems that need to be addressed. But they can also disappear or change over time.
• Be grateful for good things. Pay attention to those parts of your life that make you happy. Ask yourself, would you be happy if you did something that would make you lose them.

• Discuss this. If you have to make important decisions, try to discuss them with the person whose advice you will trust. A friend, relative, or a mental health professional will help you on the other hand look at whether you are making the right choice.
• Ask yourself if your desires are real. Men can do many successful things both in 40 years and later: returning to college, traveling the world, or opening their own business. Make sure that the new goals that you pursue are practical, and you can achieve them.

And the most important thing...

Avoid severing relationships with your loved ones. Understand, you do not need to change your life abruptly to become happy. But if you really want to do this, take it wisely, so that such changes are less destructive for the people around you.