What is the name of fear of sex? Treatment

People without phobias are rare. A person is vulnerable: he does not always have attractive appearance, material prosperity, talents, luck. It is not always healthy and adapted to the social environment in which he lives. And this is only part of the factors that prevent the formation of people's self-sufficiency, fullness and, as a result, completely healthy psyche. Fear in man is inherent in nature, it is the instinct of self-preservation. His constructive mission is to survive in dangerous situations. Phobias are pathological fears that are not related to self-preservation, devouring human energy resources, preventing its comfort and achieving success in life. One of the most widespread such pathological fears is the fear of intimacy. What is the name of fear of sex in manifestation as a mental disorder? What are the causes of this disorder, how to treat it and prevent the emergence of the younger generation? These and other issues will be discussed in more detail below.

Reluctance to intimacy as a mental disorder

Fear of intimacy is not in every case a mental disorder. Reluctance of intimacy can be caused by unwillingness to intercourse due to natural causes - immature age, unsatisfactory state of health, sexual unattractiveness of a partner and such circumstances. We will return to them. Now we will touch on a slightly different question: "What is the name of the fear of having sex, if we talk about it as a mental disorder?" Fear of intimacy, aversion from the process of sexual intercourse, while there is an attraction to the partner, is called erotophobia. Its other name is koitophobia. Erotophobia can be suffered by both women and men. This phobia is more susceptible to people with a subtle emotional organization - impressionable, with an exhausted nervous system, empathy.

Causes of erotophobia

The cause of erotophobia in most cases is the psychological trauma experienced in childhood. Early sexual activity at an early age, any kind of violence, debauched behavior of parents or, conversely, overly strict education, the ideology of an orthodox religious community to which relatives belong, all this can cause the child to dislike intimacy and block sexual energy. When such a child grows up, at the level of feelings it can manifest as a fear of sex. A person will unconsciously be afraid of experiencing those negative emotions that he faced in his childhood.

Erotophobia can be a consequence of the experience of an adult who has already experienced negative experiences - rape, a cyclically repeated scenario of building unsuccessful relationships, convictions for sexual intercourse in the circle of relatives or society, and so on.

The development of erotophobia can lead to complexes and internal enslavement of a person. Dissatisfaction with their appearance, character traits, social status negatively affects the sexuality of a person, and this phobia also arises. Fear of sex associated with complexes is more often noted in women prone to fullness and unsatisfied with the shape of their breasts. Men are most complex about the small size of the penis.

Erotophobia can be the result of other phobias - fear of any physical contact with people (even ordinary touch or handshake), fear of contracting a venereal disease, becoming pregnant, being convicted by someone, showing your naked body. Regardless of how the phobia is called, the fear of sex in this case will be secondary. And first you need to work, respectively, with the phobia-root cause.

Consequences of erotophobia

Women suffering from erotophobia may develop such diseases as anorgasmia and vaginismus. Pathological fear of sex in men can lead to psychogenic impotence. But this is only physiology.

Lack of sex usually results in a rupture of relationships. People who have a strong aversion to sexual intercourse, it is difficult to start a new relationship, not to mention their development. Undoubtedly, sex is not the main thing in the union of men and women, and it is only one of the criteria for building a strong family. Much more important than harmony in bed is more fundamental things - common views on the life of partners, the degree of their maturity and responsibility, understanding, trust. But only if there is a material basis and a sexual life that suits both partners, full-fledged long-term relationships are possible.

How to eradicate the fear of sex? Before you eradicate something, you need to make sure that this is the case. How to treat erotophobia, we will consider a little later, before we talk about the fact that it is not.

Sex and Society

The socium concerning intimate questions can influence the consciousness of people. In narrow orthodox circles such as small settlements with their local unwritten rules, the theme of sex is not welcomed and is seen as something dirty, unworthy, forbidden. This is the natural defense mechanism of society from the indiscriminate sexual relations of certain immoral personalities who can bring chaos to the lives of respectable citizens. Local harlots do not favor, they blame, and adolescent girls are put in a negative example. A similar case is religious communities preaching the idea of banning bed relations before marriage. This kind of attack of consciousness, of course, can result in fear of sex in people who have not yet formed their own life position. But here we are not talking about a concrete phobia, but about the oppressed state of consciousness of a person, which is necessary to go beyond the limits of the opinion of the society and form its own worldview.

Fear of the first intimate affinity

Nothing has to do with erotophobia, the natural fear of young people before the first intimate affinity. Fear of having sex for the first time is a common experience, connected with the lack of experience. An exaggerated emotional assessment of this event is accompanied by hormonal restructuring in adolescents, intrigues inside the circle of communication, a heap of conflicting information that one needs and what not to do during the first sexual intercourse.

Postpartum problems in women

Fear of sex after giving birth to women is also a natural state of their psyche, exhausted by the bearing and birth of a child. At the appearance of the baby, the life style of the mother changes, the issues of health and safety of the baby become priority, and this is a serious stress, and for both partners. Plus, you need to recover not only the psyche, but also the physiology of women. Doctors do not recommend having sex until 8 weeks after childbirth, this time is needed to restore the mother's body. The fear of intimacy in her during this period will be nothing more than a manifestation of the instinct of self-preservation. Another question is if such a state drags on for a long time. The pain and anguish experienced during childbirth can become a catalyst for blocking sexual energy and, as a result, the development of erotophobia.

Sophisticated ways of sex

Doubts about the new sophisticated sexual experience does not mean that a person has a phobia in this regard. Fear of sex with a group of partners, with partners of the same sex, with penetration into the anus, in places associated with extreme, etc. - this is, as in the case described above with the opinion of society, a way out of the usual facets of consciousness. Only in this case, beyond the boundaries built by itself. Another question is whether you need to go beyond these faces? Who needs it? The man himself or his partner? And is it worth the partner of self-sacrifice, if his half of sophisticated methods of sex are not needed?

Couples who are married for a long time, can resort to a variety in sex, including its sophisticated forms. This development of their intimate relationships, previously built on classic sex. But the involvement of another partner in games with sophisticated forms of sex at the initial stage of relations is far from normal. The desire for ornate carnal pleasures with every counter-transverse is inherent in people with a dominant animal origin and, as a consequence, an excessive need for sex. Such people usually put their intimate life in the first place, because they can not cope with their sexual energy. It is so powerful that, without being realized, it will turn against them in the form of internal aggression. With such people it is difficult to build a serious relationship: they will constantly "go into the night" until all their potential is exhausted.

Build relationships, including sexual, better with people who belong not to the night, not to the society, not the country, but to themselves.

Wrong partner

Fear of sex can not be manifested with every partner. Naturally, in this case there can not be talk about erotophobia. It happens that a person likes for his spiritual qualities, for his attitude, for his high position in society, but we can not force his body to want him sexually. And not always it is due to its external unattractiveness or repulsive smells. For fear of intimate relations in this case, you can take the usual reluctance to go with this partner further communication and friendship. It is important first of all to be honest with yourself and to analyze whether the desire to spend time with such a person a cure for boredom, a chance to solve their material problems, please annoying relatives, etc. And only then to consider issues relating to sex directly.

Spiritual improvement

At a certain stage in life, people who choose to devote themselves to spiritual perfection usually reduce their natural need for sex. The unwillingness to enter into an intimate relationship of such people from the outside may look like a fear of sex. But this is not fear, but lack of need. Human energy rises from the lower centers of the subtle body (chakras) to the higher and finds its realization in the service of God, meditative practices, creativity, the expansion of facets of consciousness. In this case, do not mean the prohibition to yourself to engage in sexual relations for the sake of something higher or the requirement of this charter of the monastery. It is about becoming on the spiritual path without renunciation of the world - on the path without prohibitions, but a conscious, mature, adequate worldview and elevation over the lower human needs.

Treatment of erotophobia in specialists

How to get rid of the fear of sex? Only an expert should diagnose erotophobia. A huge mistake in the occurrence of problems in intimate life is to seek help from psychologists or psychotherapists working with a wide range of human problems. When showing signs of erotobia, one should look for a narrowly specialized specialist - a sex therapist. Doctors of this specialization will help in eliminating the psychological causes of this phobia, and will solve the problem with its clinical manifestations.

Self-medication

Is it possible to get rid of erotophobia without resorting to the help of a doctor? If we are not talking about the physiological problems that caused the appearance of fear of sex, then yes. But it is important to understand that not every person is able to become himself a psychologist and without outside help to work out his childhood traumas. Another thing - the fear of sex against the background of complexes. It is possible to cope with them, having started to go in for sports, having made plastic of a breast, having reconsidered views on the appearance,

Sexual education of children

Than to treat erotofobiyu, it is easier to prevent it. It is important that the child lives in a comfortable psychological atmosphere of the family and receive timely correct information about the specifics of this world, in particular, everything related to sex. Sexual education plays an important role in the relationship between children and parents. The silence of the latter about this topic, the demonstrative reluctance to discuss it, the formation of children's attitude to sex as something forbidden will not solve it, but will also exacerbate the problem. The forbidden fruit is usually sweet. And with a lack of information, the modern world does not have any problems, the only question is in its quality.

Sex is an integral part of the personal life of an adult, and adolescents sooner or later come to study this topic. But, alas, they receive information about it not from parents, not from educators, but from the TV screen, on the Internet or in their circle of communication, due to the age very far from the correct perception of things.