Relationships are confidential. Psychology of relations between people

Today we will be interested in trusting relationships. This is a very important moment in the life of every person, because the lack of trust is a sign of not the best relations. How to build them correctly? What does that require? Can a trust relationship negatively affect a person? For all the features of the relationship between people, read on.

What it is

The first step is to understand what trust is. After all, without this, it will not be possible to fully understand what is at stake. And even more so to build a relationship of this type.

Confidential are the contacts of people, under which citizens can believe and trust each other. For example, you are not afraid to tell someone your secrets and secrets. This is a kind of belief in mutual honesty, sincerity, honesty.

It is this type of relationship that should be in families and couples. It allows you to maintain a friendly and supportive atmosphere. Unfortunately, relationships between spouses and children are not always trustworthy.

The beginning of formation

Every person sooner or later forms a character. And the style of behavior with people too. The formation of trust relationships usually occurs in childhood, since birth. In any case, on the part of children and parents. That's why the child can not be deceived.

If there is no trust in the family, then this is the model of behavior that the child will take. He will not learn to trust people. And, as a consequence, a trusting relationship for him will become something unimaginable.

Parents often wish that children can tell them everything and share everything. In practice, this does not happen very often - with adolescents to maintain trust is very problematic. Therefore, you should know how to behave with the child, if you have a desire to build trust with him. Remember: losing them is easy, but it's almost impossible to return.

How to build

What should parents pay attention to if they want to bring up the child in an atmosphere of complete mutual understanding and trust? The fact that it is necessary to show by your own example what trust is. Although without this, sometimes you can do without.

To build a trusting relationship, you must inspire the person that you are a reliable partner, who can tell everything. Share with your child your secrets and do not tell anyone what you promised to keep secret.

If the child requires attention, be sure to get distracted and take a minute to your baby. At the age of about 3-6 years, children really like to listen to stories from the series "But when you were little ...". Also, kids like to view photos. Take this opportunity. If you want to maintain good, friendly relations with your child (trust ones as well), try to give it as much time as possible. Make it clear that he will always be able to contact you for help.

A team

But in the team, relationships have always been more complex. Trusting people is difficult. It is a fact. It has already been said that it is easy to lose trust, but to return them is very problematic. Therefore, it is worth paying attention to their retention.

How to properly build relationships in the team, so they turned out to be trustworthy? It is enough to be honest and not let down people. If you can put someone to yourself, and also your reliability will prove to be (time or business), you can hope for a trusting relationship. Try not to deceive, not to let the one who believes you. Otherwise, relations can not only lose the status of confidential, but also completely collapse. Therefore, if someone believes you, do not neglect it!

Is it worth all to trust

Many people are wondering whether the confidential relations are so harmless. It would seem that there is nothing suspicious in them. Faith is good. And when you always have a person you can rely on, too.

Only if you all believe in succession, will abuse of trust begin. Before you tell something important to a person, try to analyze his behavior and character. It is possible that in a secret from you a friend tells the secrets entrusted to him.

People need to believe, but in moderation. Otherwise, as already said, there will be an abuse of trust in your address. You will be deceived, and you will believe. As they say, "trust, but check". Usually this rule applies to any interlocutor: a child, a spouse, a relative, a colleague, a simple acquaintance, a friend.

Who should not be trusted

It is worth to find out which people should not be trusted. With them, note, you will not get a trusting relationship. After all, you, most likely, will be deceived. So, there is an abuse of your faith.

Do not try to build a relationship (trust) with a pathological liar. Such people always lie, not even realizing it. People who are irresponsible and those who do not fulfill these promises should also not be trusted. You can easily be substituted. What kind of trust can we talk about? Avoid people who can not control their emotions.

Of course, true trust relationships are excluded with those who once expressed negative feelings towards you, did not want good and "put the sticks in the wheel." Most likely, a person just wants to get into the confidence, then to deal a serious blow.

Why there is distrust

Some complain: "I do not trust anyone." This is a normal and frequent phenomenon. It occurs almost every second. It is difficult to believe. Especially if in childhood you did not have an example of a trusting relationship. Where does distrust arise?

First, this feeling comes from childhood. If you saw that parents do not trust or deceive each other, there will be a lack of confidence in people.

Secondly, negative experience in this area. To say "I do not trust people" can someone who once believed, and then he was framed or deceived. The most common option.

Thirdly, because of the nature. Some people are too prudent, they are used to not trust anyone at all. In this case, it is recommended to consult a psychologist for help.

Stages of formation

If you do not take into account family relationships, then the trust is formed in several stages. The first occurs at the stage of acquaintance. Here people get to know each other and analyze behavior, intonation, stories about life. Usually this is not true trust.

The second stage is more significant. It lasts a long time. It is about creating real trust between people. Here a huge role is played by help and support. They must be repeated again and again. That is, they must be directed to the future. Otherwise, trust relationships will not take place.

In the second stage of formation, problems often arise. After all, if a person cheats at least once, it will be difficult to believe him. Sometimes it's even impossible. That's how the psychology of man in relationships works. If you are serious, try not to let your comrades down.

Learning to believe

Sometimes the negative experience of the past puts the bloc on trust. Therefore, many are interested in how to learn to trust. It will not be easy, but possible. Only work on yourself will help translate the idea into reality.

First of all, understand that negative experience is also very useful. Now you know which people you can not believe. Just keep this in mind.

Next - just do one exercise. It will help you figure out whether to believe a person. On a piece of paper write, why not trust the citizen. On the other hand - why you should believe. Evaluate the pros and cons of the interlocutor. If the causes of mistrust are insignificant, it is worth not to take them into account. Hence draw conclusions.

Also try to act on the principle of "trust, but check". It's not as difficult as it seems. In the end, remember that it is enough to choose the right people with whom you will build a trusting relationship. Usually such people do not lie, they keep promises, help others and are able to control their emotions. Also, the interviewees come here sincerely wishing you well.

Learning to trust in principle is impossible. Making the brain believe someone is not so easy. Sooner or later you can give free rein to your emotions and lose your confidence in the person again. Therefore, the only thing you can do is work on yourself. Learn to analyze people by behavior. Then you can tell exactly who can be trusted and who can not.