How to find family happiness?

Two loving people decide to start a family in the hope that they will spend all their life in harmony, and happiness will be a natural extension of their love. But a couple of years after the wedding it turns out that the long-awaited family happiness did not come. It seems that everything is good, quiet, life is adjusted, the children are full, but life goes not as dreamed. And two loving people begin to accumulate grievances and disappointments from unfulfilled hopes.

Fairy tales end with a wedding, everyone knows that. A few people know how to live on . We were not taught to be happy, and we do not know how to achieve this. Many spouses either tolerate each other, or diverge to find a new life partner. But, unfortunately, in the new family there are disappointments.

What is family happiness?

Every person perceives it in their own way. To give an answer to this question in this form: "family happiness is ...", - it is simply impossible. So, the first thing you need to start from is to understand your expectations.

Try to describe together how you understand a happy life. Probably, your performances will be different. For example, for a husband an obligatory condition for a happy life is a Sunday evening in front of a TV with a bottle of beer. And for his wife, the symbol of family happiness is a joint trip to the theater. Spouses are unhappy with each other, offended, a quarrel begins, which can develop into a protracted conflict. What to do?

First of all, remember that you both decided to become happy, and if so, then you should look at the situation from a different angle. If you do get your spouse to go to the theater with you, will it be good for him? Probably not. And if he is gloomy and depressed, will you enjoy the leisure time? Obviously not. So what is more important for you - a theater or a joy from spending time with your loved one?

Let's learn to negotiate with each other. There are things that you both like. And somewhere you can make a compromise, given the wishes of your second half. Try to do for your loved one what he wants. And you will immediately understand what was missing in your life.

I think you will not argue that happiness is the burning eyes of your beloved people, for whom you have been able to do something that they have long dreamed of. It is possible to be happy if there is joy around you.

Do not forget that men and women see the world in completely different ways, their life tasks are in many respects the opposite, that's why they complement each other. Each of the partners in its own way is invested in the creation of family happiness (or unhappiness), so advice on how to build life in the family is allocated separately for husbands and wives.

Advice to women

If you want the family to always be in harmony and harmony, it is worth considering whether your man is good near you. Try to answer sincerely. If the answer is no, then it's worth investigating the reason. Look at your husband and remember how he was when you met, what did you see in him, why did you fall in love with him? If you think that this is no longer, then you are mistaken. He is still the same beautiful prince, only you do not notice this, and he, feeling that you do not need his creative impulses and exploits, forgets his best features. Who, if not a wife, should become a muse for a loved one, help him to realize all the most ambitious plans? And you will be proud of the fact that next to you there is a real man who has achieved a lot in life.

But in order to help a man to reveal his real possibilities, a woman should stop perceiving it as a household item. Unfortunately, after several years of marriage, this attitude slips in many women. Try to understand what is important for your husband, share his interests with him where possible, support all his undertakings, even if they seem childish to you. And conduct an experiment - try not to argue with him for at least two days. Just do not argue. You will be surprised at how much your life will change.

Remember: if a man is happy with you, he will do everything to make you feel like the most beloved and desired woman in the world.

Advice to men

Try to understand why your loved one yearns for you? What happened, why is it not admired by you, as before? Maybe you lowered the bar and decided that to achieve a lot you can not afford, just resigned themselves to life, stopped moving to new heights?

Ironically, for women, the main thing is to be proud of your husband. And when she loses this opportunity, disappointment comes. If you really want to find family happiness, it's worth thinking about how to change and start setting big goals for yourself.

Final advice to both partners

Another hindrance of happiness is the emotional tension and restraint that prevent one from being open to one another. There is a wonderful way to make relationships sincere.

Have you ever tried to play with your soul mate? This question is not about love games, but about those that children love. No? Then you lost a lot.

The game helps to remove the emotional tension that partners constantly accumulate. Imagine that the husband, in response to the traditional question of his wife: "Darling, do you love me?" - threateningly replies: "No! I simply can not stand you! "- and grabbed her in an armful. And the wife laughs and tries to escape. It's very simple, but how much anxious tension, put in the question, goes right away. Noise, laughter, life - happiness returned to the house. And when the children come running and connect to the game, you will feel that you are doing well.

Games can be very different, in every family they are different. The main thing is that they go from the heart and help overcome stereotypes in relationships, bringing life back to your family.

In order to have family happiness, you need not so much. Be open and try to discern in a close person a riddle that has yet to be solved.