Second pregnancy and older child

The second pregnancy is great! Mom already knows what to expect, she is calm, there is no such confusion, which often accompanied all nine months of the previous bearing of the baby. All sensations are familiar, there are far fewer fears and experiences. But one reason for experiencing is - the first child. Each mommy is covered with fears of childish jealousy. Suddenly the older kid will offend the younger brother or sister? Will jealousy and aggression appear? And most importantly, how can mother share her attention between two children, without offending anyone?

So, let's start with when it's time for the eldest to learn about the replenishment in the family. If this is only planning the second pregnancy, then do not talk about it to the child, this process can be delayed.

But if the second pregnancy is a fait accompli, then another conversation. It is not necessary to talk about this from the very beginning. Children, especially small children, lack the sense of the concept of time boundaries, for them the word "soon" means literally now, in a minute. Long wait for a brother or sister (and he will always wait for it with impatience) will become too tiring. Therefore, it is better to postpone this news until the mother has a round tummy and wiggling baby.

After the dedication of the deceased, when the second child's pregnancy is no longer a secret, it is necessary to keep him informed of all events. Telling how a brother or sister behaves, as he now lies, and suddenly he hiccups - it's so interesting! Put a small palm on your stomach, let the child feel the jolts, pogudyvaet what put the baby: a leg, a pen, a heel. Have fun together, talk to your tummy, imagine what the second kid is thinking now, laugh, let him take part in choosing a name, the way offers his options. This is how the love for a small family member arises.

In this period, there will be certain difficulties with the elder. Previously, my mother furious with him, playing hide and seek, catching up, took in his hands, but now all this has disappeared somewhere. After my mother's explanations, he nods his head, agrees, but the offense does not pass, the child begins to be harmful and capricious. It is difficult to struggle with this, my mother needs to show her willpower and endure this period, try to lure the child with other, more quiet games: modeling, appliqué, table games. Well, if the pope understands that the second pregnancy brings some restrictions to the older child, let him take on all the active games.

The elder is very difficult now, phrases like "you do not love me" can appear. Yes, it is very insulting to hear this, but the child can be understood, his habitual way of life completely changes. The main thing is to talk more with him, talk about how his mom and dad love him, kiss him, hug him. A child should feel loved, despite the fact that the family is expected to replenish - this is the guarantee of a good attitude of the older child to the younger.

There comes the moment of "X", my mother will soon go to the hospital. Many parents make the mistake of sending the baby for this period to grandparents. Let them better come to look after him, and the child will stay informed of all events. Together with the pope he will bring his mother to the hospital for his brother or sister, along with all will be happy with the birth of the baby, and then he will meet his mother from the hospital, he will be one of the first to see the newborn.

The whole family is at home, the second pregnancy is over, but the work on the relationship of the brothers or sisters is in full swing. The next, even more difficult period for the older child begins. Now mother needs to learn to pay attention to both children, without depriving the elder. The main rule is not to let him feel unnecessary, at first it is very difficult, but everything is in the hands of the mother.