The words of condolence about death - what can and should be said?

The death of a loved one is an extremely sad event. It leaves an indelible imprint on the soul of everyone who loved and respected the deceased. At such times, any, even insignificant falseness in the words of people sympathetic to grief is acutely felt. But it is not always a sign of indifference, many are simply lost and do not know how to choose the right words of condolence about death.

General recommendations

If you were intimately acquainted with the deceased, do not pull, waiting for an invitation to a funeral or letters from his relatives. People who are heartbroken, can forget
Send the news of death or just do not know all the friends of the deceased. therefore
It is necessary to take the initiative and offer your assistance in organizing the funeral or to make a visit within two weeks after the burial. The words of condolence about death that you say, should not touch extraneous topics and your personal affairs, it would be inappropriate to use quotes from various literary works. It is best to remember the good moments from the life of the deceased, to tell how he was a person, without affecting bad qualities or unpleasant situations. Try to avoid delicately expressing condolences to those who have had a strained relationship with the deceased, because such an act will throw on them, and on you a shade of falsehood. In subsequent meetings with relatives or friends of the deceased, raise abstract topics, not reminding of grief.

It so happened that you do not have the opportunity to attend the funeral? In this situation, anyway, it is worth expressing the words of condolences on death. Send a telegram or flowers with the attached letter. Do not express in any way
Condolences on the phone, because it is not accepted. But you can send a message by e-mail or sms.

If the child died ...

It is especially difficult to choose words of condolence about the death of a child. The misfortune that befalls parents, often dislodges them and makes them shut up or even cool to each other. One can turn to religion and say that the child is now watching them from heaven, and he would not want to see that his death separates the parents, makes them become different people. They will certainly meet, but later, because everything is the will of God. If parents are not believers, just try to support them in every possible way. Remember that any sincere words of condolence about death can have a healing effect. In this situation, one does not need to be hypocritical.

If the parents died ...

Do not torment yourself with words of condolence about the death of your mother or father, especially
If they practically did not know these people. Sometimes it is enough to just be close, to help with all possible forces, by participating in the one who suffered the loss. If he wants to be alone, do not interfere, but be sure to send a letter with warm words to support a grief-stricken person.

Remember - any words you want to say should go from the heart. Do not be like people who just want to observe some formality. This is the only way to truly honor the memory of the deceased.