Self improvementPsychology

Dual, ambivalent - is it a deviation or a natural property?

The world is multidimensional. The human personality is also not one -sided and not one-sided. But the fact that we have different motives, thoughts, motives, desires - this is not the whole complexity. Often a person experiences simultaneously opposite feelings. Ambivalent - this word just means "dual," "bidirectional." How can this be understood and explained? Various incentives and needs are constantly struggling in us. For example, the desire to relax and play on the computer may be in conflict with the request of the girl to go with her to the cinema. The motive is ambivalent - this is one in which we do not have a single feeling. Often in relation to loved ones and loved ones we experience the whole gamut of experiences. For example, many of us are familiar with the state of "and love and hate." Why is this happening? Because we are rivaled by selfish feelings and altruism, the desire to be an independent person and the need for intimacy.

Ambivalent - this does not mean "bad" or "doubtful," this word only indicates the complexity and bi-directional experience. It is not so rare to hear or read stories in which this very moment puzzles a person. First of all, one who has such feelings. For example, if a seriously ill close person dies, for many it is due not only to the bitter loss and loneliness, but also to a kind of ... relief. And this is normal, for such experiences, in any case, do not blame yourself. After all, each of us has the instinct of self-preservation. If the grief had completely subordinated our life, we would not have the strength to sustain existence. High risk of severe mental illness would be high.

Ambivalent is something at once "with a plus" and "with a minus", attraction and repulsion. Such feelings and attitudes are often encountered in life. Real self-knowledge also consists in knowing how to recognize these two-way signals, motives, experiences. After all, being in a state of eternal hesitation is also impossible. Many vital steps require unambiguous decisions from us. And this means that one feeling or motive must obey another. For example, when marrying, girls often - even despite the mad love of a future life partner - experience mixed, Contradictory experiences. Sometimes they even begin to feel that they have made a mistake in choosing the groom. But the matter is somewhat different: the ambivalent attitude towards marriage is just normal. After all, it shows that a person is mature and realizes that not only pleasures and joy lie ahead, but also self-giving, work, submission of interests to the spouse and family.

A certain duality is inherent in most people. The usual doubts that we are facing difficult and important steps are also a struggle of motives and opposing feelings. But sometimes throwing and difficulties with prioritization become too vivid and noticeable. About such a person they say that this is an "ambivalent person". Not always it is a question of mental deviations, perhaps, it is only the accentuation of character. That is, compared with the "average", such a person often experiences opposite feelings, enters intricate ties, can not decide on his position with respect to anyone or anything.

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