How to find your way in life? Psychologist's advice

Human life is not just a biological phenomenon. This is an individual socio-historical fact. Because every living being grows and develops, but only a person is formed, as a person with his worldview, values, aspirations and achievements, as well as direction. And, most importantly, with individual goals, plans, dreams and aspirations. By achieving and living by them, a person goes his own way in this world. But not everyone has it all this way. Some do not even know how to find their way in life. And exist aimlessly. This topic is often considered by psychologists, capable of their advice and recommendations to help people come to the goal of existence and find their way in life. That's what I would like to talk about.

Outside the Way

First I would like to note that the person's life is divided into five phases. Particular attention was paid to this by the German psychologist Karl Bühler. And the first phase, which lasts until 16-20 years, is beyond the life path. Because this period precedes self-determination. Such a young man does not yet have the full range of opportunities, profession and access to all the chances to prove himself.

The second phase

It, as a rule, begins with 16-20 years and lasts up to 25-30. In this rather long period of youth, a person begins to try himself in various fields of activity, form connections with other people, even look for a couple. At this stage, self-determination begins.

This - the statement of the individual individual positions in different situations, the formation of the worldview and values, as well as setting a benchmark for self-organization. After him, most often, there are hopes. Which in this case are associated with sketches of possible ways of life.

Obstacles

At the second stage, many are confronted with confusion, uncertainty, fear and uncertainty. Often, fears are connected with the fact that a person realizes the responsibility that lies on his shoulders in connection with the life choice he has made. After all, he himself defines acceptable social norms, dominant landmarks, important values and much more. For many people, this period is so prolonged that they completely lose the idea of how to find their way in life, and aimlessly exist every day.

Problem of choice

If a person remains in a lost state for a long time and does not know why he wakes up daily, then it is necessary to act. It is better to start by defining the model of your path.

"Life as Creativity" - this option is suitable for people with inclinations to experiments. Those individuals who like to experiment on their own destiny. Their life paths seem to non-standard people, accustomed to the "ordinary" model. Which is called "life by the rules." This is the least successful model. Because a person who focuses on it follows the rules that are established by society, authorities, conventional norms. He lives by the principle "as usual," and not the way he wants. And when this awareness comes to him and the feeling that he has spent his years in vain, it is too late. And the bitterness of regret at such moments is incredible.

For some, the "life as an achievement" option is appropriate. Everyone who chooses it acts as a man who "made himself". These are workaholics, pragmatists, careerists - all people who consider the time given to them, as a valuable resource for the realization of as many goals as possible, capable of providing a better life.

I would also like to note a model called "life versus life". People who follow it are in a constant process of struggle. In the figurative sense of the word, of course. And most often the struggle is for social benefits.

Listen to the desires

That's what a person should do first, if he thinks about how to find a way to a new life. Desires are part of our being. They are individual and changeable, everyone has his own. But they are all social in nature. And desires, due to the conscious activity of man and his thinking, sooner or later degenerate into some life goals. Which determine the meaning of existence.

The right way in life a person will be able to determine if he listens to himself. To what he wants. Strong desires always become goals, as they are a powerful stimulating energy for any human activity - be it creativity, business, or interpersonal relationships.

Recommendations of specialists

Absolutely every psychologist will tell his patient: "The path of your life is only your decision." And he will be right. Only a person has the right to dispose of it. But still there are many practical recommendations that can help you understand your aspirations and desires.

If a person really does not know what he wants, then he needs to expand his sphere of knowledge and circle of interests. How? We must start trying something new, not previously known. Often the way of a person's life lies beyond his perception. And when he covers with his attention those areas that were previously closed from him, he seems to begin to see his existence from a different angle. There arises an invaluable sense of long-awaited certainty - a person finally finds what he has long sought.

Also, psychologists recommend not to limit themselves. Some may think that effective work is possible only in one direction. Of course, there are goals that require a "full immersion". But do not spend all of yourself on its implementation. It is recommended that such a goal be combined with others that take less time and effort. As a rule, they are perfectly combined and harmonized.

A guide to knowledge and opportunities

Finding the beginning of a path in a person's life will be easier if he analyzes himself as a source of useful resources for his passage. What can he do? What acts are they capable of? How far can go, in pursuit of the meaning of life? Abilities play an important role in the life course. After all, they are the properties of individuals that determine the successful implementation of a particular type of activity.

Abilities are our internal mental regulators, which make it possible to acquire skills, knowledge and knowledge. Some of them determine the success of education and training, as well as the formation of personal qualities. Others are responsible for the production of new ideas, discoveries. Abilities are human resources, which he must necessarily use in order to achieve goals. Knowledge of their presence often helps to find the path of spiritual life. You just need to ask yourself one question: "What am I capable of?", And give answers to it. Perhaps in one of them the meaning of life will be hidden.

About values

For sure every person, accepting congratulations in honor of this or that event, heard in his address and this: "I wish you to find your way in life." Indeed, many are able to say this, but not everyone is allowed to support the choice of a person. Because the conflict of values has always had and will have a place.

And the life path is determined by them. Because a person can find happiness only in the event that there is something significant in his existence capable of satisfying his diverse needs. And nothing else. A person for whom first priority has independence, absolute freedom and entertainment, will not be completely happy if he burdens himself with a family, children and responsibility to them. And vice versa. The one who dreams the most of a big happy family will not be happy if it disappears at work for days.

So what are we talking about? The fact that, when determining their own way of life, a person should be guided not only by desires and opportunities, but also by value. They are part of his soul.

Forecasting

If a person does not know what he wants, and believes that he is in a desperate situation, then this is not so. Just to solve the issues you need to approach from the other side. And to answer the following question: "What do not I want?" As a rule, people find answers faster.

Only they should be specified. It's clear that the majority will reply: "I do not want to live my years aimlessly." But what exactly is embedded in this statement? Everyone has something of their own. Some do not want to be lonely in their old age. Others do not want to live their entire lives in the same city. For some, poverty and poverty are the worst fear. Someone else is afraid to leave this light, leaving nothing behind.

There are thousands of options. But the essence is this: if there is not the slightest idea of one's desires, then one must build on the opposite.

Testing

It can really help some people who are puzzled by the question of how to find their way in life. A test of this kind can be found in free access. It is aimed at researching the needs of the individual and his motivations. All he needs is to answer the questions that are already ready. Options are usually available. So it remains only to note the most suitable and close to a person.

As an example, you can bring several questions from different blocks. The first is formulated as follows: "Time is money. We must strive to earn as much as possible. " The question from the second block sounds as follows: "Work is a forced vital necessity". Then, as a rule, there are questions aimed at identifying the factors that take the most time from a person, as well as determining the predisposition to various spheres of activity. To all questions, by the way, such variants of answers are offered: "I agree with this", "50 x 50" and "I do not think so".

Of course, after this, a person will not discover the truth about how to find his way in life. The test, however, may lead to reflection. And the results will prompt a direction in which it would be worthwhile to start acting.

Self-realization

How to find your way in life? We must do what works best. Or what I always wanted to try myself. At the same time, all doubts should be cast aside. Many just because of them bury their dreams and desires. And in fact in vain. What to lose? No wonder they say - it's better to do and regret than regret that did not. Even if it does not work out - a person will know what he tried.

It's very important to realize your potential. This is a basic necessity for every person. Even Abraham Harold Maslow included self-realization in his famous pyramid of needs. And Aristotle said that happiness can be achieved only by realizing its potential capabilities.

But for this, one needs to get rid of the word "must". Almost every second will say: "Yes, I would like to study music / choreography / sports / arts / tourism, but all my time is taken up by work. I need to earn money to live. " Yes, this is reality. Need money. But the changes in life are also necessary! You can find another job that takes less time. Or even organize your business. Work that does not bring joy and satisfaction is an excellent reason for dismissal and the subsequent formation of business. And this, in turn, is not only a useful business and a personal source of income, but also a way of self-realization.

The awareness of freedom

That's what really matters. A person who thinks about how to find the right way in life should first of all understand that he is absolutely free. And he is free to do whatever he wants.

But many people in life follow anything, but not their desires. They listen to parents, the media, are guided by conventional conventional norms and laws, exist in accordance with the banal model of life. It's as if they forget that only they and no one else are masters of their life.

But freedom is available to everyone. The right to it is fixed even in the Constitution. Freedom is the person's ability to live and act in accordance with personal goals and interests, guided by the knowledge of objective necessity. And in no case can not forget about it.

Rules to remember

How to find the right way in life? It is necessary to follow simple recommendations:

• Remember that it's never too late to change life for the better.
• Do not forget that everyone has problems.
• To perceive failure and trouble as an opportunity to gain experience.
• Regularly test (provoke) new sensations.
• Do your favorite thing.
• Forget yourself in the past and love your "I" in the present.
• Pay attention to your skills, self-development and hobbies.
• Set a goal, and for no reason from it does not retreat.

And most importantly - remember that life is a series of efforts. Having found the goal, you will see the road. And this will put an end to the wanderings, will give strength for a confident move towards her.